Paternity Test – Putting the Child First
We must not forget that the child's welfare is the most important factor in a paternity test.
Parents (or alleged parents) who have opted for a paternity test can find it easy to get tied up in their own emotions and forget about how the child may be affected by it all. Separated or divorced parents, or parents unwilling to take responsibility for a child, are often preoccupied by their own wishes and the child gets pushed to one side. The paternity test can end up being more about money and status than about being a parent.
Your child matters
All children deserve a loving and nurturing environment to grow up in but, sadly, many children do not have this and when parents fight over paternity the child can suffer long term emotional damage. The parents should try to put their feelings to one side and concentrate on what will be best for their son or daughter.
How you deal with the issue of a paternity test largely depends on the age of the child. Some have grown up with the man they believe to be their father, and have already reached their teens when that paternity is challenged. The shock of discovering that they may have a different biological father, together with feeling betrayed by the mother, can leave them emotionally scarred, and can also damage their relationship with either or both parents. In contrast, younger children who are part of a single parent family may not have formed an attachment to the father figure and are largely unaffected by any question of paternity.
Approaching the paternity test
If you do need a paternity test you should spend some time thinking about the relationship you already have with the child and how that relationship is liable to change depending on the outcome of the paternity test. It might be wise for you and the mother to seek counseling to assist you in approaching the test the right way. Also, depending on age, the child may also benefit from talking things through with a professional.
A list of organisations that may be able to offer help and support can be found on our useful websites page. |
